Emilio Sparks - The Charlie Rose of Hip Hop

So I watched the series finale of “Entourage” three times…Big “Fuck you!” Entourage. Entourgae really does create a fantasy that doesn’t exist. Never in my 28 years of shenanigans have I seen EVERYTHING work out.

The conundrum lies in the emotional investment to these characters and the fact that we love the lifestyle portrayed. With no real logic magically and conveniently there’s always a happy ending. I was taught very early on in life that there are fuckin consequences to actions. For the entire run of this series consequences never existed.

From unbelievable career offers to becoming millionaires; this show has no consequences for movie stars or their posse. Vince, who’s been out of rehab for what feels like 8 days smokes a joint, witnesses a suicide, beats a drug test with a fake dick, flirts shamelessly throughout an interview that should hurt his career and winds up happy as can be.

E bangs his ex’s Mother-in-Law, yet winds up with Sloan despite making no attempt for a possible amends or humbling himself in any way to show some sort of growth since her absence.

Turtle is a huge fuck, up yet winds up with millions of dollars because his smarter rich friend bought his shares in a tequila company. Johnny finally gets a job, then goes on strike to get his co host Andrew Dice Clay more money. He’s told his strike has ended the show, but it was a bluff as they BOTH go back immediately and make the movie his famous brother wants to produce.

REALITY CHECK this show creates a type of lifestyle most will never achieve. Even fuckin relationships work out on “Entourage”. Vince; smitten with Journalist Sophia and her British accent decides he wants to marry this broad after one date. Who needs a second date or days of texting…shitty chemistry conquers all huh? The hot knocked up multi millionaires daughter (Sloan) waits by the plane for the man who fucked her step, step, step mother and gives E another chance. Ari; who for years is unattentive to both his wife and kids reconciles with Mrs. Ari…Of course the wife goes back the husband after Ari gives up the only career he knows. Lets eat on love…LOVE DONT PAY BILLS STUPID! Thank you Entourage for spoon-feeding me the constant message: love conquers all.

Does it really? I was left with my dick in my hand labor day weekend after making another failed attempted with a girl who constantly flip flopped and used the past as a crutch because she wanted out.

So the type of forgiveness Sloan and Mrs. Ari gave does not exist in the real world. I wish I can jet set to Paris…well not Paris…matter fact, FUCK Pairs! The ex wants to go there, so fuck Paris and fuck her!…starry eyed dreamer who romanticized about living in Paris. With what money are you living in Paris with? News flash asshole you don’t speak French we’d starve and die cold. I’m lucky I’ve went as far as Union City, New Jersey with that dunce.

I wish life was that perfect, where I had the funds to pick up and go and know I’m always going to have the love of my life hanging off my arm. God damn you “Entourage” for making me feel even worse than I have felt for weeks. I’m sorry a 28 minute series finale caused this rant…. FUCK IT…NO IM NOT.