Thank goodness for DVR, the invention really is a lifesaver. For numerous reason DVR is a helpful tool the fast forward factor is very underrated. Now your thinking did he really breeze through RAW, will this review be total shit? No heres why.
I speed through the fluff now that could be most if not all of the program, yet I still have faith so with remote in hand lets start GO….. Triple H started off Monday Night RAW, Im getting flash backs of 2003. In 03 hunter had beef with both HBK and Kevin Nash. 8 years later the old man beef continues.
Triple H said that he could make friends or make money. He said he’s always lived by those words. Hunter said he considered himself the lucky one who was able to make money and have a strong group of friends. He mentioned Shawn Michaels, Sean Waltman, and Kevin Nash. No mention of Scott Hall, REALLY Hunter.. Not cool bro not cool.
Buy this point the crowd eating out of Hunters hands. Hunter said Kevin Nash broke my heart,” The broken hearted went on to say he wants to kick Nash’s ass. Johnny Ace makes an appearance and stared to say something raspy but Hunter told Laurinaitis to shut up and not walk through the ropes. Hunter said Laurinaitis’s job for tonight was to search the building and find Nash, and bring him to the ring.
Triple H left the ring stopped to yell at Johnny Ace some more Kevin Nash walked out behind Triple H and hit him with a sledgehammer. Kevin Nash is a ninja. All sorts of craziness went down with EMS and security personal a backstage segment later triple H collapsed and foamed at the mouth.
I giggle when Cole and Lawler use the somber voices while discussing a medical situation.
Backstage Hunter, who was strapped to a gurney, gets abducted by Super Shredder. Nash put the sledgehammer in Hunters face and BAM. Security pulls Nash away from Hunter. When Nash doesn’t speak he is entertaining to watch, not all the time but moments like this he’s watchable.
Randy Orton and Sheamus beat Christian and Cody Rhodes. The match was real a good opening match. Sheamus catches Cody in the nuts with a Brogue Kick followed up with a Celtic Cross (it will always be the Razor’s Edge to me) for the three. Cole said knee but that shit was a nut kick.
Backstage, Laurinaitis on the phone with Mrs Hunter assured her that Triple H is okay. For some reason David Otunga was in the room he spoke for 3 whole seconds as John Cena burst into the room and started performing stick, plugs Zack Ryder’s Twitter page then asks to have a match with Miz and Truth. Ace says that match goes down tonight and he will pick Cena’s tag partner.
Dolph Ziggler accompanied by Vickie Guerrero and Jack Swagger beat Santino Marella. Yeah I left the room too. Ziggler hit his finisher for the victory. After the match, Swagger put Santino in the ankle lock. Mason Ryan aka Batista junior ran out and made the save continuing the build to to a Mason Ryan Ziggler match.
Backstage, the hot Bellas were standing around looking hot Zack Ryder who was super stoked excitedly announced that he’ll be John Cena’s partner in the match against The Miz and R-Truth…
Ricardo Rodriguez, is in good voice tonight as he introduced Alberto Del Rio. Del Rio talks about retaining the WWE Championship and said it’s going to stay that way for a long time.
The Punkster begs to differ and goes into detail Punk style about Del Rio. ADR calls Punk a loser and says losers don’t get title shots. John Laurinaitis makes another appearance and suggested Del Rio vs. Punk for the WWE Championship at Survivor Series. Punk isn’t exactly solid that is this easy to get a title shot and questions Laurinaitis actions. Ace wants to hear Punk say he respects him, Punk sarcastically says so and Ace responded with he now has to think about. Is this really compelling TV?
So what feels like a wasted segment Punk attacked Del Rio, who avoided the GTS. Ricardo Rodriguez wasn’t so lucky GTS from Punk…
We finally get a match and its Alicia Fox vs Natalya. Beth Phoenix was on commentary. Beth kinda looked hot. Lets not forget to mention Wade Barrett beat John Morrison. The announce team could careless about this match just like you and I. Michael Cole talked about tweeting
Michael Cole in the serious voice announced that Triple H suffered a concussion. He said he also suffered a neck injury. WWE has to have stock in twitter because they plugged the shit out of twitter all night, Cole makes mention the Jim Ross has been on Twitter mean things about Cole. Cole said he wants to put an end to it once and for all. Cole challenged Ross to “The Michael Cole Challenge.” He said he was going to keep the rules under wraps. He said that if Ross wins, he’ll quit…Yeah I can care less about this match as well.
So who else is pissed that The Muppets will be featured on next week’s Raw. Really The Muppets. Are you kidding me? I bet Fozzie Bear can cut a better promo than Johnny Ace but WTF. Expect a John Cena, Missy Piggy segment. Santino Marella, Zack Ryder and Hornswoggle are going to get shoe horned into this mess as comedy relief.
For a brief second the idea of watching a John Morrison match seems better than Muppet segments, then I came back to my senses. Muppets > Morrison.
I dont know if you realize this loyal readers but kids make up a chunk of WWE’s audience, fan our age are in the 10 percent. The Muppets have a movie to promote and Vince McMahon loves this kids and Vince loves to bring ratings anyway he can. I talk as if The Muppets are real. Kermit the Frog the Raw General Manager
Josh Mathews interviewed Zack Ryder, The Miz and R-Truth attacked Ryder and left him lying backstage… The Miz and R-Truth started to make their entrance. Angry Miz and Truth cut the promo of the night
John Laurinaitis had changed the main event. Due to Ryder’s injury it will now be a handicap match. John Cena defeated The Miz and R-Truth by DQ in a handicap match. Laurinaitis entered the ring and said he wouldn’t stand for their disrespect. He told Miz and Truth to get out and then ordered the referees to escort them to the back. They started to leave, but Laurinaitis told them to stop. He said he was going to put them in a legitimate tag team match.
Laurinaitis said he picked Cena’s partner and it didn’t work out, so he’s letting Cena pick his own partner at Survivor Series. A “Rocky” chant started. Cena said that if he’s going to beat The Miz and R-Truth, then his partner must be someone who is going to BRING IT. Cena announced that his partner will be The Rock.
Closing thoughts: What I got from this RAW was The Muppets will be guest hosting next week. John Cena’s movie looks like complete ass, ads aired for The Rock’s return to action at Survivor Series and finally WWE hearts twitter a lot. I hope Cena is in on this so called “conspiracy” that CM Punk has accused Laurinaitis of being involved in. If this is a setup for Cena turning heel on The Rock at Survivor Series than all the nonsense we’ve endured for weeks on end will be worth it….Maybe